If you're familiar with my resume rants I normally advise (albeit usually in an incredibly sarcastic and snarky manner) that people NOT list an Objective on their resume.
Why? Because 95% of the job seekers out there that insist on using this old school method blow it in some fashion.
How? Usually by limiting themselves to a very specific company or job description that doesn't relate to the position or company they are applying to.
This is a result of the changing times and the shifting economy- too many fish in the job pool understandably results in a need to apply to a bevy of jobs that one wouldn't have needed to apply for years ago.
It's called desperation and I get it.
Completely get it.
Which is why I'm advising not to be on Team Objective. I don't care if you're on Team Edward or prefer to roll with Team Jacob, but just don't be on Team Objective. Change your method, adapt and be a better "fish" in the pool if you will. There are many other ways to convey your skills and talents, enticing an employer to let you contribute to the continued success of their great company. You no longer need an Objective to accomplish this.
So while I'm sure I'll cover better "methods" in the future, let's get me off my soap box for now and back to the real reason you're reading this- the humor. Shall we?
Here's the glaring example that stuck out like a sore thumb at me today and got me started on this rant in the first place: One slightly mediocre applicant put THIS as her Objective:
"Seeking for a position in Insurence where there will be enough scope to demonstrate my ability."
I guess it wouldn't have to be a very wide scope considering you can't even spell the word insurance correctly.