H8ters B H8ten

There's a saying out there in the Universe- something like "You're not really somebody until people start hating you ..." or some wording to that extent.

I guess I've arrived as the hate mail is coming in by the droves.

I hadn't really realized I'd "arrived" anywhere until it started piling up, but then I started analyzing things a bit.

Perhaps being on the 1st page of 3 major search engines and supported and encouraged by 5 best selling authors COULD mean that this blog might be going places and getting some attention. 

Might.

Last night someone sent me a hate message that sent me over the edge and I decided that for once, instead of just ignoring the haters as I usually do, I would fight back.

Disclaimer: to all my regular, faithful blog reading chickadees, you might want to skip this posting as I'm about to go apoplectic. 

Or stick around for the show. Your choice.

Either way, you've been warned.

First of all, let me just say that I've noticed a trend with my haters.

They tend to be Baby Boomers or Millennials. (Millennials = Generation Y and below)

This doesn't shock me, because guess what? These two groups are the ones having the hardest times finding jobs right now. And just ask any restaurant owner or manager, angry people tend to flock to the internet to make comments and send "you should burn in hell" hate comments and email. If only my haters would take the pent up anger and hostility they're spewing towards me and actually put it towards any kind of an effort involving NOT being a jackass in their job searching, they'd probably get hired and be nicer people.

But no, they spend their energy on me. I guess that's kind of flattering now that I think about it. 

Here's a news flash for those of you reading my blog that don't like it:

IT'S MY BLOG. I CAN WRITE WHAT I WANT. I'M NOT BEING PAID BY SOME COMPANY TO WRITE IT. IF YOU DON'T LIKE IT, THEN STOP READING IT YOU FUCKING MORONS.

I have to point out, I am truly amazed at how many separate entries have been cited when speaking about how much they hate it in the emails I receive. Really? I've written 105 posts, so judging from all the different pieces you've cited, you spent a LOT of time reading to come up with all your different bones to pick. Do you know how stupid that makes you sound, you pedantic ASS?

And for the ones that like to point out that I like to end sentences with fragments, prepositions and question marks? You can go fuck yourself. 

I write like I speak. I am aware of misplaced modifiers, the correct usage of ellipses, and how to use "whom" and "who" vs. "that" and "than". 

I could unleash enough information about the difference between "en" and "em" dashes to make you all go whimper in a corner. But I don't, I choose not to as that's not why I blog. I am not Grammar Girl; I'm an overworked, frustrated, frequently assaulted recruiter. This blog is my therapy. It's also a form of therapy for a lot of other recruiters and HR reps as they've KINDLY emailed me and told me so. So telling me I have a "smug, elevated attitude" is laughable as really, I'd like to see YOU do better in my shoes. Really, I would.
I double fucking dog dare you.

And to the woman that said my blog was responsible for the entire country's deterioration in the past 20 years because they are reading my "expert advice"? This blog has been up for 8 months. 

EIGHT MONTHS. Go back to your corner muttering to yourself about how YOU'RE superior to all the hiring managers and company higher ups (which I can tell you right now is why you don't have a job) and DO THE MATH. Fucking idiot.

I think my favorite are my younger ones that think they DESERVE to have everything handed to them. I can spot "Generation Y Don't You Do It For Me*" a mile away. How you ask? They email me like they're texting their BFF some hate mail.

Take this chick that messaged me last night:

"im sorry but you are brutal, mean and u really are self centred... if i sat at your desk yes i would be stressed out but i wouldn't go to the computer and write- i know u have a tough time but you need to take a cooler...sorry 4 being judgey and don't take this personal"

Sorry 4 being judgey and don't take this personal? And you'd be better than me if you had my job and you wouldn't go to the computer and write? Dear GAWD I hope not because you obviously don't know how. Also? I feel I need to point out the fact that you're messaging me what your messaging me is doing the exact thing you said you'd never do. I expect this would be lost on you, which is why you're still at home being cheered on by mom and dad who secretly hope some clueless company will finally hire your sorry ass so they can stop paying all your elaborate, "I'm entitled" bills.

TO ALL THE H8TERS, my message is simple- just STOP READING MY BLOG. DUH.

KTHNXBAI.

*  I give credit where credit is due: title borrowed from Jeneration X by Jen Lancaster.