Monday, March 5, 2012

It's Monday Baby!

And you know what that means....Meanies!

Today's example of a Meanie Asshole comes from some dude named Elliot. (Name made up of course... to protect the innocent- which would be me in case you are asking.)

So the premise of this email I received is the same as always...I found Elliot on a job board, I saw stuff on his resume I was interested in, I called him and left a message on his voice mail. Elliot seemed normal when I heard his voice mail message, there were no prior indications of lunacy in his message.

I emailed him and approximately 26 hours later, THIS is what I got back in my inbox (and the red highlights are exactly where they were in the original email):

"I have informed you on numerous occasions to "NOT CONTACT ME REGARDING SALES POSITIONS." I have also talked to several individuals and informed them the same thing. Just because the word "sales" is on my resume does not automatically mean I WANT TO BE IN SALES!!! I have kept every email that I have received and both my email and conversations have stated clearly that I have NO INTEREST WHAT SO EVER IN BEING A SALES PERSON. I have also stated clearly that if I am every contacted again by you, that I was going to contact a lawyer and sue you for harassment and ignoring MY NUMEROUS REQUESTS TO BE PLACED ON YOUR DO NOT CALL LIST. THIS IS NOT A THREAT, IT IS A PROMISE, THE NEXT TIME I GET CONTACTED I WILL BE CONTACTING A LAYER AND PRESSING CHARGES AGAINST YOU. With all the proof I have I don't think I would have any problem having a layer take my case. PLEASE REMOVE REMOVE REMOVE me from your damn list and this DEFINITELY MY LAST WARNING AND REQUEST.
Respectfully yours,
Elliot ___________"

Okay, where do I begin here?
There's so many things to discuss with this particular Meanie.

First of all, this is the first time I've contacted him. So I guess he's been approached by a bunch of other horrible recruiters like myself looking to do something AWFUL like employ him.

Silly us.

Second, if you don't want a job in sales I have 2 suggestions for you- either takes your sales experience off your resume COMPLETELY or leave it on and put some kind of disclaimer underneath that section that says "While I enjoyed my time in this position, I have no interest in a future career in sales."

This is simple, yet will save a lot of unnecessary aggravation for the poor recruiters in your path AND your blood pressure levels.
Not that I care about Elliot's blood pressure.
Because I don't, just for the record.

You're going to contact a "layer" Elliot?

And last but not least- "Respectfully yours"?
Check your damn auto signature if you're going to GO ALL CAPS LOCK ON SOMEBODY'S ASS.

You fucking ungrateful moron.

1 comment:

  1. Fucktard... I know I abuse that "word," but I mean, seriously??? Just....


    I don't want sales either, bro. But you don't have to be a douche.