Wednesday, February 22, 2012

Confession Time

Okay, it's confession time.

I've been doing this blog for a while now and over the many months that I've been faithfully posting and using this as my griping platform, my boss has been quietly (and oh so patiently) letting it unfold.

I don't know why exactly he puts up with it (or me for that matter) except that perhaps he sees it (and me?) for it's (my?) good attributes.

Whew. That was a mouthful.

People ask me frequently how my boss feels about the fact that I've published this blog, but the truth is, we've rarely had direct conversations about it. They've been more "beat around the bush" conversations involving me trying to bolt out of his office like the building's on fire once he brings it up. I know he cringes any time anybody discusses it or he sees a new post show up on his rolling Facebook news feed.

(Yes, I'm friends with my boss on FB. Many people have advised me NOT to be over the past year or so, but we are a small office, which equates to a more "family" like setting--- we know each other's vices and virtues and exploit each other accordingly, just like a real family would...ergo, we are friends on Facebook.)

Anyhoo- I suppose if I were to really analyze the situation and how this all unfolded, there is an innate understanding that if I don't spout off in some form, I might blow. I've mouthed off to my patient boss more than once (and not jokingly mind you) that some of the stuff I'm exposed to is so damn rotten and downright abusive (search my archives for Meanie Monday posts to get a partial taste of what I'm talking about), I might need therapy for it. And that's saying a lot coming from a background such as mine where I previously worked with kids that were mentally ill or in foster home situations where they'd been pulled out of extremely abusive homes. Not to mention the fact that not only does insanity run in my family, it freakin' gallops. (Just kidding mom and dad!)
(And yeah you fellow Pinterest Whores, I totally stole that line from Pinterest...who stole it from somebody deserving but not formally credited on the internet...) Look! Here it is!

The point is, my boss is patient regarding this topic... and I think (quite frankly) continually in shock that people actually read it. (I am too for that matter LOL.)
My blog is like the elephant in the room (office?) and it's getting larger and larger and harder and harder to shove out of the way every day, but he's still tolerant nonetheless.

Why am I talking about this you ask?
Because last week something *mahvalous* happened.

Here's the scene in a nutshell:
Our office got a visit from two great execs, who'd flown in from Chicago to meet with us and a handful of other accounts they carried in our area. I wasn't paying much attention to my boss's calendar (even though I stare at it all day long and are constantly scheduling people on it... great secretary/admin type I am eh?) until like the afternoon before the visit was to occur, it finally dawned on me whose name I'd been booking people around. I buzzed boss man over the phone system and said "This Alex on your calendar, is that *Alex from CareerBuilder* Alex?" to which I'm sure he rolled his eyes back in his office and then replied "Yeessss. What about her?" Me: "She's coming HERE? Or are you just having some kind of a phone meeting?" Him: "Noooo, she's coming here. Why?" Me: "Uh, I dunno. I've just never gotten to meet anybody from the big bad daddy CareerBuilder building up in the Chicago skyline before." (Well okay, that's not what I said exactly, but that's sure what I was thinking!)
Him: Click.
(He does that, he'll just suddenly hang up on you. That's how you know the conversation you were having is over.)

So I sat there contemplating this concept. Alex was physically coming to our office. How cool.

Now for a little background- I'd (we'd) always had the same CareerBuilder account exec named Ryan for years. YEARS. He helped me with random ridiculous problems; would try to explain things over and over to get them through my thick, blond head...we were a comfortable "familiar" with how lame brained I was and how he was going to save me.

Alex transitioned into Ryan's position when he got a promotion a few months back, so she jumped right in and rolled up her sleeves when I instantly had some stupid ass issue that I couldn't figure out. She calmly walked me through how to fix my little minuscule problem and we'd talked a few times since then, but we'd never actually had a physical visit to the office to my knowledge. Certainly not since 2008- so this was new to me.

The day arrived, we had appointments booked before and after Alex's meeting time, but low and behold, she brought a trusty and handsome sidekick named Graham (yo Graham!) with her. I'd never spoken with Graham before, didn't know him from boo, but nevertheless, there he sat across from me on our cushy, olive green sofa next to Alex.

Now let me just say as a side bar, I'm pretty convinced after recently cruising through some pics of the CareerBuilder execs back in Chicago that you cannot be fugly and work there. They just won't tolerate it. I'm sure it's some sort of unspoken code, like how fire fighters always have to be smokin' hot (pun intended) or they won't be accepted into the fold... you know, that unspoken code. I'm fairly sure that's what's going on over there, but of course, being a completely legit operation and certainly up on all the legalities of employee hiring practices, they'd vehemently deny my observation. I'm not sure if I was expecting some 520 lb. chain smoking 73 year old hag or what, but let me just say Alex (short for Alexandra) was cotton pickin' adorable and Graham was quite the catch too. Both professional and quick on their feet of course, suffice it to say, the big dominating CareerBuilder gurus in the sky know how to pick employees.

That being said, we conversed briefly with light hearted banter about how us Californians have NO clue as to what cold is (and of course, I sheepishly had my ski jacket draped over the back of my chair behind me and was wishing I'd placed it somewhere else that morning...) when boss man finally came up to retrieve our visitors and take them back to his office. As they were starting down the hallway and had passed my desk, Graham turned and said to me "We read your blog!"
Say wha?
This. Was. Hysterical.

Once those words came out of his mouth, it was as if time slowed down to the pace of quick sand, and yet it all happened so fast, it was unreal. The only thing I can equate it to is that weird feeling you get when you watch that horrible movie The Matrix, with Keanu Reeves.

It felt like this:

I'm pretty sure I said "You do??" with this quizzical look on my face and then as I glanced at boss man, he looked like he was turning various shades of abnormal colors and appeared as if he was about to do one of these:

He did manage to bark out in a shocked questionary tone:
"You do?!?!?"

To which our visitors laughed and then continued to discuss it down the hall to his office where they closed the door and I was left wondering what the HELL they were in there saying about me and my blog my boss tolerates. 



This totally and completely made my day,
my week,
my month, 
and quite possibly
my last 6 months.

Thank you Alex and Graham for this simple mention and your kind words about being readers.

Stay tuned for more actual resume funny tomorrow my peeps! Peace out!

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